The Journey Of A Christian Reaching For God With The Aid Of Buddha's Teachings

Archive for May, 2012

Internet issues

I am currently having internet issues. I hope to write day 19 tomorrow or monday.


Day 18 – May Meditation

Instead of just writing the same old post about how I meditated today,  I thought I would post an article I saw that one of my friends posted…  The article is “Why I stopped meditating: acts of rebellion + intention”.



Why I stopped meditating: acts of rebellion + intention

“Meditator” isn’t a label I’d give myself, though I’ve meditated for years — in temples, on the bus, on cushions, in the tub, with and without formalities and teachers. (People who put things like, “And Joe has been a meditator for twenty years…” in their bios make me wonder. Unless of course, you’re a mediation teacher. But otherwise it doesn’t impress me as a pick up line, mostly because I’ve known some long-time meditators who were very cranky, or paranoid, or rude to waiters. Meditating doesn’t guarantee that you’ll be more compassionate or loving, it just means you can call yourself a meditator.)

I’m Meditator Lite. Meditator Light. Reluctant, Flailing, Empassioned…person who meditates.

But I then stopped formally meditating. Intentionally. Not like when you don’t go to the gym one week and then a month goes by, not that kind of slow halt. I actually declared that I would not sit in lotus or pick up mala beads, or watch my breath for, well, maybe forever. The very thing I was doing to feel liberated felt confining.

My practice — which was not that grueling to begin with — started to feel like one more thing to do. Meditation became an assignment and I felt I was being graded by an invisible monk. Polishing my consciousness, counting my mantras, strength-building — achieving. Meditating was becoming a way to reinforce my “goodness” — good at taking care of myself, good at seeking, good at being holistic, good at being good. And meditation was becoming a crutch for being “on”. Meditate before the gig, the interview, the meeting to make sure I was ON TOP OF IT. I felt pressured to meditate to relieve the pressure. From this frustration, a question surfaced: How present would I be if I didn’t focus on being “prepared”? I dared myself.

Some very beautiful things happened when I stopped meditating.
I learned to work without a net.

I learned that I am still loving and insightful even if I don’t pause for cosmic clearance. A deeper kind of strength came forth — calm, and ancient, and sturdy.

From my new vantage point, I could see with great clarity the essential reasons that I had meditated — and I gave myself permission to love those soul inclinations:

I meditate for comfort.

This is an admission of sorts that gives me great relief. I don’t necessarily sit to empty my mind, or to “grow”. I meditate because I deeply crave the comfort of connection with, if even just a taste of, The Mother of The Mother of All Things Ever. I crave The Spaciousness That Cradles, The Light That Burns Boundaries. I want to be home. This feels so good. I want to feel that good as much as possible. Yep, I meditate for comfort.

I meditate for disruption.

Sometimes I go digging in the back alley of my psyche just to stir shit up. I look for lurking fears and I turn up the volume on the critical tapes. I tend to do this when my psyche is like still water, just when things were going so well. I love this act of conscious antagonism. It shows me my power to heal, how far I’ve come, what monsters are still misbehaving at my table and who at that table needs more compassion.

When my meditation is an act of loving others, I get higher, faster.

The times when I devote a meditative session to someone/something else — whether it’s a string of mantras, or sending someone light while I’m sitting on a park bench — I get a rush of divine currency that is the yum of being alive. I like it. A lot. The surest way to experience oneness is to be the giver.

Intention is everything.

Meditation is an act of compassion for myself and others — when I come from a place of compassion. When I meditate to achieve, it’s a striving; when it’s to prove something, it turns into enduring. And when you’re in a place of compassion – you’re able to be more fully present with all of it — the pain and the joy, yours and others.

Sometimes, you need to stop taking your medicine to let your body heal itself. Sometimes, you need to pause so you can move forward. Sometimes, you need to turn away from something so you can see why you fell in love in the first place.



– Article from:


Day 17 – May Meditation

I completed my meditation today early in the day around 9am.  Since my Metta doesn’t take long to say, I first listened to the Metta video from the Current Challenge Page.  I focused on the Pali words as I thought about each group of people from my Metta.  Then, I read my Metta out loud while sitting in a traditional position.  Then, I focused on each group and sent out loving kindness to all.

***Though, I did my meditation early, that does not mean, I cannot recite my Metta at other times.  Today on my walk to work, I brought my Metta up on my cell phone and read it out loud.  I figured sharing some extra loving kindness would help me to feel more loving and kinder while I worked.

“Whether one believes in a religion or not, and whether one believes in rebirth or not, there isn’t anyone who doesn’t appreciate kindness and compassion.” – Buddha (1)

(1) –

Day 16 – May Meditation

I enjoy the time I have just sitting on my bed with my eyes closed and getting away from the craziness of the world.  It allows me some time to reflect on my behaviors and analyze how I allow others to affect my mood.  Today, I sat on my bed after an inspirational work meeting and I realized that I am not as friendly as I had originally thought I was with people.  So, I sat on my bed and spoke aloud so that I could listen to the compassion and loving kindness I was sending out to the world.  After reading my Metta aloud, I thought about the people I had seen that day as well as the people I know that I do not get to see.  Then, I took some time to go through my Facebook and remove the clutter of people that I do not know so that I could focus on maintaining a relationship with the people that mean the most to me.  I have started going through my friends list in order to make a connection with people that I may not have spoken to in a long while.  Even if it is a simple “Hi, I was thinking about you” or “love the profile picture.”  This helps to keep the lines of communication open with the people I call my friends and family.  No matter how far apart I am from my friends and family, I know that no distance will keep me from their love or keep my love from them.


“A family is a place where minds come in contact with one another.  If these minds love one another the home will be as beautiful as a flower garden. But, if these minds get out of harmony with one another, it is like a storm that plays havoc with the garden.” – Buddha (1)


(1) –


Day 15 – May Meditation

We are starting a new meditation today and I couldn’t be more excited. We are starting the meditation known as Metta, which means to cultivate loving-kindness towards oneself, then loved ones, friends, then strangers, then enemies, and finally towards all conscious beings.  I have chosen to use the video below as a template for writing my own Metta. My Metta is quite similar to the video with some modifications to make it fit for me here and now.  After finishing my Metta, I sat down in a traditional position and read out loud my Metta meditation (below).

My Metta Meditation
May I be free from hostility and danger
May I be free from mental suffering
May I be free from physical suffering
May I take care of myself happily
May my parents teachers, relatives and friends
be free from hostility and danger
be free from mental suffering
be free from physical suffering
May they take care of themselves happily
May all meditators and people unknown to me in this world
be free from hostility and danger
be free from mental suffering
be free from physical suffering
May they take care of themselves happily
May all my enemies, those who have hurt me in the past and those
who have yet to hurt me, those who have hurt people I care for, either physical or mentality
be free from hostility and danger
be free from mental suffering
be free from physical suffering
May they take care of themselves happily
May all beings
all breathing things
all creatures
all individuals
all personalities (all beings with mind and body)
may all females
all males
all noble ones
all worldlings
all humans
all those in the four woeful planes
be free from hostility and dangers
be free from mental suffering
be free from physical suffering
may they take care of themselves happily
May all being be free from suffering
May whatever they have gained not be lost
in the eastern direction
in the western direction
in the northern direction
in the southern direction
in the southeast direction
in the northwest direction
in the northeast direction
in the southwest direction
in the direction below
in the direction above
whatever beings that move on water
may they are free of mental suffering and hostility
and from physical suffering and danger
As far as the highest plane of existence
to as far down as the lowest plane
in the entire universe
whatever beings that move in air
may they are free of mental suffering and hostility
and from physical suffering and danger.
May we all live with peace and happiness in our hearts and share our joy with all beings
all breathing things
all creatures
all individuals
all personalities (all beings with mind and body)
may all females
all males
all noble ones
all worldlings
all humans
and with all those in the four woeful planes

May all be blessed…

“Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” – Buddha

Everyday is Mother’s day!

I totally agree.. I always tell people who ask me what I did for my mother for Mother’s Day that I did nothing… I love my mom everyday, not just because Hallmark says too…


My greatest gratitude to the Unknown photographer. I received this touching photo through email.

A small child know how to Filial to his mother.

How about us?

Are we doing enough for our parent?

Are we giving enough “LOVE” to our parent?

Are we spending enough “TIME” with them?

Are we “CARE” enough?

To me, Mother’s Day celebration is not only on 2nd Sunday of May. It should be EVERYDAY.

According to Master Cheng Yen, Filial Piety is one of the most important thing we must do it now while our parent are still around.

Don’t do “A Show” in their funeral to show our “Filial piety”. It is too late!

Regret is the biggest Punishment in life!

Share with you a few good quotes:

The kindness of Parent

“There is nothing like the love of a mother and father. Parents endure great hardship for us and provide everything we…

View original post 162 more words

Day 14 – May Meditation

Today, I did something a little different for my daily meditation.  This is the last day of the Anapanasati breathing meditations and the day was so beautiful that I decided to go to the beach.  While I was there, I felt the need to do my meditation right then and there sitting on the sand.  I began at around 3:00pm and allowed myself to take in everything around me  in the here and now.  Here is what my senses told me.

Touch – I felt the feel of the sand through my hands as I pushed my hands into the sand.  I picked up some and felt the sensation of the sand flowing through my fingers.  I felt the feel of the wind blowing on my skin and through my hair as it rushed across the water, up the sand and into the city of Vancouver.  I felt the feel of the sun as it gave its glowing shine on my face and arms.  It felt warm to help balance the chill of the wind.

Smell – I smelt the smell of the salty water as the air pushed the scent of the ocean water across the land.  I could smell the distinct seaweed scent as I slowly breathed in and out.

Sight – I saw the mountains towering over the cities and the waters with snow capping each one of them.  I saw the sand as it was shaped and molded by animal tracks, footprints, the water and the wind.  I saw the waves white capping as they approached the sand and gently rolling up the shallow slopes of the sands.  I saw the boats coming and going delivering goods, people, and giving tourists the joys of the bay.  I saw the people playing and enjoying the beauties and wonders of nature.  I saw the birds searching for love, searching for food, and being as they are meant to be.  I saw the tall blades of grass next to a stump blowing in the wind as if they were waving to the sky.

Hear – I heard the sound of the birds as they called to their loved ones and warned others of danger.  I heard the laughter of people playing on the beach and the playgrounds.  I heard the waves white capping in the water and splashing on the shore.  I heard the wind as it blew pass my ears.  I heard the sound of people running behind me as they become healthier and stronger.

After about 45 minutes, I got up paid my respects to nature and walked home relaxed, peaceful, and with a better understanding of the world around me.


“We need to live as the Buddha taught us to live, in peace and harmony with nature, but this must start with ourselves. If we are going to save this planet we need to seek a new ecological order, to look at the life we lead and then work together for the benefit of all; unless we work together no solution can be found. By moving away from self-centeredness, sharing wealth more, being more responsible for ourselves, and agreeing to live more simply, we can help decrease much of the suffering in the world,” from the Buddhist Statement on Ecology 1996. (1)



(1) –


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